Sins of the father

Tom Tomorrow comments on the tendancy from certain corners to say "He says he supports the war, but I don't see him or his children in combat".

However, neither Tom Tomorrow or the people he linked to mentioned what I find to be the most wrong-headed and illogical aspect of this sort of reasoning. Saying "I don't see him" in combat is one thing, saying "I don't see his children in combat" is quite another.

Whether or not you believe it that a person who supports a war should be involved in military activities themselves, it is completely inappropriate to say that if a person supports a war, they should send their (young adult) children into the military. This is because the children are their own people! They are human beings, with thoughts and feelings and their own political opinions and the basic human right to self-determination. They might not even support a war that their parents support! They are not chattels, they are not vassals, they are not Borg, they are not corporate representatives. Their actions and life choices should not be interpreted as having to reflect their parents' politics because that denies the children's very humanity - their right to self-determination!

I'm sure it's difficult to have your child be in a war and devastating to have your child killed in a war, but it is always more difficult for the child, who is actually in the war! It is simply incorrect to say that war-mongerers should "make the sacrifice" of having their own children be in the military, simply because it's not the parents' sacrifice to make! Ultimately it is the soldiers themselves who are making the sacrifice, and to imply that it is the parents' sacrifice completely trivializes what the soldiers are going through.

It is especially strange that this is happening in the US, which traditionally sets great store by self-determination. You'd think the American public would be the first to acknowledge that even if the parent is a hawk, the child still has every right to be a dove, or a chicken, or any other bird metaphor you can come up with, and should not be forced into a particular life course because of who their parents are.

If this isn't convincing, try wrapping your brain around it another way: think about your parents. Think about your parents' opinions about things. Think about your parents' opinions on political policy, on how a person should live their life, on what makes an appropriate romantic partner, on what music a person should listen to, on what job a person should have, where a person should live, how a person should dress, what a person's family situation should be, what a person should do in their spare time. Think of everything your parents have ever expressed an opinion on. Now imagine that you were required to live your life in precise accordance with your parents' opinions about everything. How would that make you feel?