I just found out that the band Alexisonfire pronounces its name "Alexis On Fire". I always thought it was "Alex Is On Fire".
Therefore, someone needs to start a band called "Alex Is On Fire." I think making it four different words would circumvent the trademark issue.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Figure skating music bunny
The Puppini Sisters' version of Walk Like An Egyptian would make good figure skating music. I could totally picture a music video for this song with people skating along the Rideau Canal or similar - skating in a "using it as a mode of transportation to get to a destination" way, not in a "let's skate around and have fun" sort of way. (Iść, not chodzić).
(As usual, the video is irrelevant, it's just the only way I could embed the song)
(As usual, the video is irrelevant, it's just the only way I could embed the song)
Friday, February 19, 2010
Things They Should Invent: contact method prioritization chart
All businesses should have a page on their website that lists in priority the best/most effective way to contact them for any given transaction (i.e. should I do it through the web site, or call them, or come in in person?)
I'm sick and tired of choosing the method that's most convenient for me only to be told that I have to do another method anyway, or it would have been way faster if I'd done another method, or having employees react to me like "WTF did you do that for?"
I'm sick and tired of choosing the method that's most convenient for me only to be told that I have to do another method anyway, or it would have been way faster if I'd done another method, or having employees react to me like "WTF did you do that for?"
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Things They Should Invent: Coach-less Olympics
I'd like to see an elite athletic competition where none of the athletes are allowed to use coaches. They have to figure it all out themselves. Why? Because it would be interesting to see what happens.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
A (spoiler-free) quote from the latest Dexter book
Of course, for some bizarre reason, we don't have a National Registry of Who Your Friends Are.
Um, Dexter darling, it's called Facebook!
Monday, February 15, 2010
What to do if your Phillips Wake-Up Light hisses
My Phillips Wake-Up Light makes a hissing sound after I change the alarm settings. I've discovered that unplugging it from the wall and then quickly plugging it back in makes this go away. And, for some reason, if you do it quickly, the clock doesn't lose its settings.
(The internet has also suggested that this can be fixed under warranty, but I bought mine on ebay.)
(The internet has also suggested that this can be fixed under warranty, but I bought mine on ebay.)
Subterfuge
A while back, Language Log mentioned a book called The Big Penis Book. Before moving on to the morphosyntax of the title, the author says "I realize I don't have to defend my interest in the book...". And while he does go on to defend his interest in the book, when I was reading that for the first time back in 2008, it struck me for the first time in my life: you don't actually have to defend your interest in that book. We're all adults here, we can read The Big Penis Book if we are interested in doing so.
It does seem odd that it would take me until the age of 27 to realize that we don't need to defend our interest in whatever thing we might be interested in, but you have to remember that for the vast majority of my life, I was a child. And when you're a child, these things work differently. If you want The Big Penis Book when you're under 18, you have to justify it to your parents. Even if you can acquire it without their permission, they're probably going to ask you to explain yourself when they find it in your room. And even if your parents do allow you to keep it, your teachers at school might take it away and call your parents and try to get you in trouble. And even if you can get past all these grownups, if your classmates find out, they're probably going to call you gay and make your life a living hell. All in all, when you're a child, it really is best and easiest to resort to subterfuge.
The subterfuge becomes a habit - after all, you've never known anything else - and it does take some time and perhaps a bit of external revelation like I got from that Language Log post to realize that in adult life, if you just quietly do your thing, no one's going to judge you or try to stop you. People simply don't care if you're reading The Big Penis Book.
And that's where Adam Giambrone made his mistake.
We're an open-minded lot here in Toronto. No one would care if Adam Giambrone didn't have a partner by his side. How many people can recognize, or even name without googling, David Miller's wife or George Smitherman's husband? The only people were actually interested in Adam Giambrone's relationship status were those who think he's pretty. In any case, especially when you eliminate the demographic who wouldn't consider voting for him because of his age and/or politics, no one would care if he didn't have a partner. No one would care if he was single and enjoying "casual encounters" as they say on Craigslist. A 19-year-old girlfriend would have briefly raise a few eyebrows, but ultimately we'd shrug and go "Meh, they're all adults." No one would especially care if he were poly or in an open relationship with honesty and consent by all parties. Even if he danced down Yonge St. during Pride in a leather harness and fishnets, we'd just applaud and wolf-whistle and gloat about it when comparing ourselves to other more uptight cities in the world. But the fact that he had a long-term relationship, publicly presented himself as part of a long-term relationship - and this in a context where no one would have batted an eye if he didn't have a partner beside him - and then ended up being a cheater was the nail in his coffin.
It's like if he had announced, a propos of nothing, that he's working his way through the complete works of Tolstoy. The press never asked what he's reading, the only people who've asked what he's reading are people who are trying to flirt with him, but he tells people he's working his way through the complete works of Tolstoy. He also makes it known that he keeps a copy of War and Peace in his briefcase, perhaps seeing to it that he's photographed reading War and Peace on the subway. Then someone discovers that, inside the War and Peace cover is not Tolstoy's masterwork, but rather The Big Penis Book.
No one would have expected him to be reading War and Peace in the first place, it would never have occurred to anyone to think less of him for not reading Tolstoy right this minute, and no one would have particularly cared if he was seen overtly reading The Big Penis Book. But the subterfuge is the problem. It's what teenagers do when they don't want to get caught reading The Big Penis Book, and it's unbecoming an adult who would presume to be mayor of a city of millions, especially when the major barrier to his candidacy is seen as his relative youth.
It isn't about lying per se and it isn't exactly about the adultery (although I, personally, do find that distasteful and it is a large mark in the minus column). It's more about the choice to have an elaborate cover-up (i.e. camera-ready long-term partner brought into the spotlight as part of the campaign) of something that doesn't need covering up (i.e. multiple casual relationships).
All of which is terribly unfortunate, because this campaign is already skewing further right than I'm comfortable with.
It does seem odd that it would take me until the age of 27 to realize that we don't need to defend our interest in whatever thing we might be interested in, but you have to remember that for the vast majority of my life, I was a child. And when you're a child, these things work differently. If you want The Big Penis Book when you're under 18, you have to justify it to your parents. Even if you can acquire it without their permission, they're probably going to ask you to explain yourself when they find it in your room. And even if your parents do allow you to keep it, your teachers at school might take it away and call your parents and try to get you in trouble. And even if you can get past all these grownups, if your classmates find out, they're probably going to call you gay and make your life a living hell. All in all, when you're a child, it really is best and easiest to resort to subterfuge.
The subterfuge becomes a habit - after all, you've never known anything else - and it does take some time and perhaps a bit of external revelation like I got from that Language Log post to realize that in adult life, if you just quietly do your thing, no one's going to judge you or try to stop you. People simply don't care if you're reading The Big Penis Book.
And that's where Adam Giambrone made his mistake.
We're an open-minded lot here in Toronto. No one would care if Adam Giambrone didn't have a partner by his side. How many people can recognize, or even name without googling, David Miller's wife or George Smitherman's husband? The only people were actually interested in Adam Giambrone's relationship status were those who think he's pretty. In any case, especially when you eliminate the demographic who wouldn't consider voting for him because of his age and/or politics, no one would care if he didn't have a partner. No one would care if he was single and enjoying "casual encounters" as they say on Craigslist. A 19-year-old girlfriend would have briefly raise a few eyebrows, but ultimately we'd shrug and go "Meh, they're all adults." No one would especially care if he were poly or in an open relationship with honesty and consent by all parties. Even if he danced down Yonge St. during Pride in a leather harness and fishnets, we'd just applaud and wolf-whistle and gloat about it when comparing ourselves to other more uptight cities in the world. But the fact that he had a long-term relationship, publicly presented himself as part of a long-term relationship - and this in a context where no one would have batted an eye if he didn't have a partner beside him - and then ended up being a cheater was the nail in his coffin.
It's like if he had announced, a propos of nothing, that he's working his way through the complete works of Tolstoy. The press never asked what he's reading, the only people who've asked what he's reading are people who are trying to flirt with him, but he tells people he's working his way through the complete works of Tolstoy. He also makes it known that he keeps a copy of War and Peace in his briefcase, perhaps seeing to it that he's photographed reading War and Peace on the subway. Then someone discovers that, inside the War and Peace cover is not Tolstoy's masterwork, but rather The Big Penis Book.
No one would have expected him to be reading War and Peace in the first place, it would never have occurred to anyone to think less of him for not reading Tolstoy right this minute, and no one would have particularly cared if he was seen overtly reading The Big Penis Book. But the subterfuge is the problem. It's what teenagers do when they don't want to get caught reading The Big Penis Book, and it's unbecoming an adult who would presume to be mayor of a city of millions, especially when the major barrier to his candidacy is seen as his relative youth.
It isn't about lying per se and it isn't exactly about the adultery (although I, personally, do find that distasteful and it is a large mark in the minus column). It's more about the choice to have an elaborate cover-up (i.e. camera-ready long-term partner brought into the spotlight as part of the campaign) of something that doesn't need covering up (i.e. multiple casual relationships).
All of which is terribly unfortunate, because this campaign is already skewing further right than I'm comfortable with.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Question Ugly Betty needs to answer
What happens to Hilda's fetus?
They had an ultrasound that found the baby didn't have a heartbeat. So no baby for Hilda. But there's still a dead fetus in her uterus. What happens then? Does it come out by itself? Do they need to D&C it out? Even if they don't show this on screen, they should at least mention it in passing, because it's a great big question mark for people like me who have no experience with pregnancy.
(Also, Betty, Ignacio, and Babydaddy (I forget his name) were all in the ultrasound with Hilda, and the ultrasound technician makes some comment to the effect that she's never seen that many people in the ultrasound room before. Surely it's not THAT uncommon for a patient to bring in her babydaddy and her own parents (and maybe babydaddy's parents too) to get a first look at the baby? Or for the patient to bring the baby's biological father and the baby's future adoptive parents? Or her spouse and children? I mean, I'm sure in most cases it's just the baby's bio-parents, but I seriously doubt three support people is so uncommon that a tech would never have seen it before and would feel the need to common on it.)
They had an ultrasound that found the baby didn't have a heartbeat. So no baby for Hilda. But there's still a dead fetus in her uterus. What happens then? Does it come out by itself? Do they need to D&C it out? Even if they don't show this on screen, they should at least mention it in passing, because it's a great big question mark for people like me who have no experience with pregnancy.
(Also, Betty, Ignacio, and Babydaddy (I forget his name) were all in the ultrasound with Hilda, and the ultrasound technician makes some comment to the effect that she's never seen that many people in the ultrasound room before. Surely it's not THAT uncommon for a patient to bring in her babydaddy and her own parents (and maybe babydaddy's parents too) to get a first look at the baby? Or for the patient to bring the baby's biological father and the baby's future adoptive parents? Or her spouse and children? I mean, I'm sure in most cases it's just the baby's bio-parents, but I seriously doubt three support people is so uncommon that a tech would never have seen it before and would feel the need to common on it.)
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Worst. Poll. Ever
Today's Globe and Mail poll question:
I haven't been following US politics especially closely, but surely there's a strong possibility that the correct answer is somewhere between the two extremes?
Is this the worst U.S. Congress ever, or is the system working as intended?
I haven't been following US politics especially closely, but surely there's a strong possibility that the correct answer is somewhere between the two extremes?
Friday, February 12, 2010
"Not a real sport"
Some people like to accuse various sports of not being a "real sport".
Why does it matter? Spaghetti isn't a real sport and I still enjoy it.
Why does it matter? Spaghetti isn't a real sport and I still enjoy it.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Outstanding customer service from Beddington's
A week ago last weekend, I bought a beautiful new duvet and duvet cover from Beddington's (Yonge & Eg location). I love them! The duvet is fluffy and warm and I feel secure like a swaddled baby wrapped in it, and the duvet cover feels good to the touch and is high thread count and matches my existing sheets perfectly.
Unfortunately, last weekend - only a week after I bought it - the zipper on the duvet cover broke. Part of the actual slidey thing broke off, so the teeth of the zipper would no longer stay inside the slidey thing. This had the unfortunate effect of rendering the entire duvet cover useless, because with the zipper open the duvet slides right out in the night and I wake up covered in basically a sheet with the duvet on the floor.
However, I am very happy to report that, despite the fact that this was a final sale item and linens are as a rule non-returnable (understandably - no one would want to buy used sheets!) Beddington's promptly, cheerfully and without drama allowed me to exchange my duvet cover for another one. Furthermore (and important to a shy and insecure person like me), I didn't need to be assertive or negotiate or anything. I just walked in, asked politely, and got the best possible outcome, being treated like my request was eminently reasonable and no imposition whatsoever the entire time.
It is very refreshing to see a retailer (especially one at a reasonable price point!) stand behind the quality and workmanship of their products. I originally went to Beddington's because they're geographically convenient, but they've just won themselves a loyal customer.
Unfortunately, last weekend - only a week after I bought it - the zipper on the duvet cover broke. Part of the actual slidey thing broke off, so the teeth of the zipper would no longer stay inside the slidey thing. This had the unfortunate effect of rendering the entire duvet cover useless, because with the zipper open the duvet slides right out in the night and I wake up covered in basically a sheet with the duvet on the floor.
However, I am very happy to report that, despite the fact that this was a final sale item and linens are as a rule non-returnable (understandably - no one would want to buy used sheets!) Beddington's promptly, cheerfully and without drama allowed me to exchange my duvet cover for another one. Furthermore (and important to a shy and insecure person like me), I didn't need to be assertive or negotiate or anything. I just walked in, asked politely, and got the best possible outcome, being treated like my request was eminently reasonable and no imposition whatsoever the entire time.
It is very refreshing to see a retailer (especially one at a reasonable price point!) stand behind the quality and workmanship of their products. I originally went to Beddington's because they're geographically convenient, but they've just won themselves a loyal customer.
Perhaps I've been reading The Onion too much
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Wednesday, February 10, 2010
In the great tradition of blogging about why I haven't been blogging
One of the boilers in one of the hot water tanks in my building is broken, so hot water has been sporadic these past few days (and I'm just not fit for human consumption without a hot shower in the morning). Property management was very responsive (I sent a WTF email right after I got out of the shower, and by the time I got home in the evening there was signage explaining the problem and with an ETA for fixing it), but it doesn't negate the crankiness caused by unreliable hot water.
The zipper on the beautiful new cover for my beautiful new duvet completely broke, rendering it useless only one week after I bought it, so I have to go back to the store and convince them to do something for me about that even though linens are (understandably) non-returnable. I will be blogging about the customer service I receive, either way.
In the process of dumping my coffee grounds in the garbage like I've done every day for the past decade, I somehow managed to throw the whole filter basket in the garbage (rather than just inverting it and dumping the filter). Without noticing or realizing I did it. And I threw the garbage bag down the chute. And didn't notice until the next morning when I went to make coffee and the filter basket just wasn't there. So now I have to replace my coffee maker. Anyone know where I can get a small (4ish cup) coffee maker with a timer?
I just found out that RRSP deadline is March 1. I thought it was March 31. I'm scheduled to diversify this year, so now I have to educate myself and set up a whole new RRSP within just a couple of weeks.
The writers are consistently under-estimating how long it will take them to finish the texts. The printer deadline is inflexible. Guess who has to do frantic, panicked overtime? I can't produce work that I can be proud of under these conditions, but it's more important to the client to have something suboptimal by deadline than something perfect after deadline. So I braindump as fast as I can type, turning around an hour's worth of work in 10 minutes, and come out of it sounding like a total n00b who hasn't yet mastered when to depart from the source text. In print and readily googleable. I am SO glad my name isn't on it!
I spilled pickle brine all over my kitchen floor yesterday. Now my floor needs hardcore scrubbing.
Plus I hate all my clothes, the rate at which new wrinkles are appearing on my face is faster than the rate at which I can adapt to and gracefully accept them, and my fridge smells and I don't know why.
And Mercury isn't even in retrograde!
The zipper on the beautiful new cover for my beautiful new duvet completely broke, rendering it useless only one week after I bought it, so I have to go back to the store and convince them to do something for me about that even though linens are (understandably) non-returnable. I will be blogging about the customer service I receive, either way.
In the process of dumping my coffee grounds in the garbage like I've done every day for the past decade, I somehow managed to throw the whole filter basket in the garbage (rather than just inverting it and dumping the filter). Without noticing or realizing I did it. And I threw the garbage bag down the chute. And didn't notice until the next morning when I went to make coffee and the filter basket just wasn't there. So now I have to replace my coffee maker. Anyone know where I can get a small (4ish cup) coffee maker with a timer?
I just found out that RRSP deadline is March 1. I thought it was March 31. I'm scheduled to diversify this year, so now I have to educate myself and set up a whole new RRSP within just a couple of weeks.
The writers are consistently under-estimating how long it will take them to finish the texts. The printer deadline is inflexible. Guess who has to do frantic, panicked overtime? I can't produce work that I can be proud of under these conditions, but it's more important to the client to have something suboptimal by deadline than something perfect after deadline. So I braindump as fast as I can type, turning around an hour's worth of work in 10 minutes, and come out of it sounding like a total n00b who hasn't yet mastered when to depart from the source text. In print and readily googleable. I am SO glad my name isn't on it!
I spilled pickle brine all over my kitchen floor yesterday. Now my floor needs hardcore scrubbing.
Plus I hate all my clothes, the rate at which new wrinkles are appearing on my face is faster than the rate at which I can adapt to and gracefully accept them, and my fridge smells and I don't know why.
And Mercury isn't even in retrograde!
Monday, February 08, 2010
The smile's returning to the faces
Today, for the first time this year, there was one last hopeful pink ray of sunlight still peeking over the western horizon when I left work.
Sunday, February 07, 2010
How to end Ugly Betty
1. Betty hooks up with Claire Mead's adopted-out son
2. Claire Mead hooks up with Betty's father
3. Connor Owens is Amanda's biological father
4. Marc and Cliff get back together
5. Justin becomes Daniel's new assistant.
Add your own!
2. Claire Mead hooks up with Betty's father
3. Connor Owens is Amanda's biological father
4. Marc and Cliff get back together
5. Justin becomes Daniel's new assistant.
Add your own!
Thursday, February 04, 2010
Things They We Should Invent: Union of Post-Boomer Workers
Conventional wisdom is that there's going to be a talent shortage after the baby boomers all retire. I'm not sure whether I believe this, but in case it is true, we, the workers who will remain, need to think about how we're going to leverage this. If it's going to be a workers' market, it would be the perfect opportunity to restore labour standards to pre-90s-recession levels. Job security. Pensions. Benefits. No contract hell unless you're really into that sort of thing. My grandparents could take an unskilled or semi-skilled job, work hard for decades, make enough to support their family, and retire in their 60s. We should take this upcoming opportunity to create a world where we (and future generations) can enjoy the same quality of life. I have no idea how to do it, but it has to get done.
(Added bonus conspiracy theory: what if the powers that be created the current economic crisis in anticipation of this very worker's market, to create an environment where Good Jobs are seen as asking too much?)
(Added bonus conspiracy theory: what if the powers that be created the current economic crisis in anticipation of this very worker's market, to create an environment where Good Jobs are seen as asking too much?)
Tuesday, February 02, 2010
This must be an analogy for something, I just haven't figured out what yet
I'm currently reading the official biography of the Queen Mother. It seems when the UK was working on creating their National Health Service in the late 1940s, the Queen Mother (who was at that time the actual Queen of England) was opposed to it. Why? Apparently before the National Health came in many hospitals were charity-run, and Her Majesty felt that if the government provides this essential service to everyone who needs it, British subjects might not feel that it's as morally imperative to exercise the Christian virtue of charity.
Overall and in general, she seems very much full of noblesse oblige and not at all an upper-class twit. There have only been two things in the book that made me go WTF (which isn't so bad because it's a big fat book in a completely Other setting and so far all the action has taken place in the first half of the 20th century, when values and attitudes and practices were much different.) But that one just came a slapped me in the face and made me do a triple take.
It must be a useful analogy for something, I just haven't figured out what yet.
Overall and in general, she seems very much full of noblesse oblige and not at all an upper-class twit. There have only been two things in the book that made me go WTF (which isn't so bad because it's a big fat book in a completely Other setting and so far all the action has taken place in the first half of the 20th century, when values and attitudes and practices were much different.) But that one just came a slapped me in the face and made me do a triple take.
It must be a useful analogy for something, I just haven't figured out what yet.
"helped me alot in my college assignement"
In a recent post about the Star's apparent inconsistency between print and online as to standards for what constitutes graphic content, I received the following comment:
"Interesting," I thought, "that must be why every college program I've ever looked at has a mandatory English communications course." I then proceeded to continue going about my life normally.
Then, a bit later, on a post containing nothing but an inconsequential analogy, I received the following comment:
"That's odd," I thought, "there's no possible way that post helped anyone with a college assignment." Then I realized that that comment sounded kind of familiar. So I went a-googling, and found 155,000 hits for "helped me alot in my college assignement."
Based on the first few I clicked on, all of them are anonymous comments, none of them link to anything. What kind of spam is this?
Anonymous said...
Good fill someone in on and this enter helped me alot in my college assignement. Gratefulness you on your information.
"Interesting," I thought, "that must be why every college program I've ever looked at has a mandatory English communications course." I then proceeded to continue going about my life normally.
Then, a bit later, on a post containing nothing but an inconsequential analogy, I received the following comment:
Anonymous said...
Nice dispatch and this enter helped me alot in my college assignement. Thanks you as your information.
"That's odd," I thought, "there's no possible way that post helped anyone with a college assignment." Then I realized that that comment sounded kind of familiar. So I went a-googling, and found 155,000 hits for "helped me alot in my college assignement."
Based on the first few I clicked on, all of them are anonymous comments, none of them link to anything. What kind of spam is this?
Monday, February 01, 2010
Question I wish I could ask my parents
When I was a kid, my parents often said to me "Life isn't fair," as though that's somehow reassuring.
Here's what I don't get, and I wish it was possible to have a frank and honest conversation with my parents to figure it out: If you don't think life is fair, why would you bring a child into life? As in, what redeeming qualities do you think life has to so counterbalance this inherent lack of fairness to the extent that it's worth making a specific effort to bring in more and innocent people?
Here's what I don't get, and I wish it was possible to have a frank and honest conversation with my parents to figure it out: If you don't think life is fair, why would you bring a child into life? As in, what redeeming qualities do you think life has to so counterbalance this inherent lack of fairness to the extent that it's worth making a specific effort to bring in more and innocent people?
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