Quite a few times I've heard middle-aged men (for some reason it's only ever middle-aged men) express confusion/frustration/anger that you aren't supposed to use the word girl to refer to a grown women, but sometimes grown women refer to each other as girls.
I've been working on clarifying this, trying to quantify it and make a mathematical formula based on age and balance of power, but my shower just gave me a much simpler rule:
It is acceptable for you to call another adult a girl (or a boy, as applicable) if it is acceptable for them to call you a girl or a boy in the same sentence in the same context.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
How to dress Betty Suarez
I'm not too thrilled with the wardrobe person on this season of Ugly Betty, because they have Betty dressed so ridiculously. It should be believeable that either a) Betty thinks she looks good, or b) Betty thinks she looks trendy. But this season, with multiple prints and too many colours (and this "too many colours" assessment is coming from someone who is currently wearing pink eyeshadow and purple nail polish with a shirt in one shade of red and lipstick in another shade of red) it's like she's a caricature of a caricature of a caricature.
In previous seasons, she'd wear for example a brightly-coloured dress, but her tights and shoes would be opaque black. With that, the average viewer could at least see where she's coming from. But a blue dress with a hideous-printed bow thing in colours that weren't found elsewhere with bright red tights? No way she thinks that looks good.
So what should she wear? She should wear something that is trendy on paper, but just doesn't work for her. Remember the poncho in the first episode? That's where her clothes should be going. In each episode, she should wear a gaudier, more colourful, misfired knock-off of whatever, say, Amanda was wearing in the previous episode.
In previous seasons, she'd wear for example a brightly-coloured dress, but her tights and shoes would be opaque black. With that, the average viewer could at least see where she's coming from. But a blue dress with a hideous-printed bow thing in colours that weren't found elsewhere with bright red tights? No way she thinks that looks good.
So what should she wear? She should wear something that is trendy on paper, but just doesn't work for her. Remember the poncho in the first episode? That's where her clothes should be going. In each episode, she should wear a gaudier, more colourful, misfired knock-off of whatever, say, Amanda was wearing in the previous episode.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Things They Should Study: body language a sociolinguistic perspective
I don't wink. The best way I can describe why is to say that it isn't part of my active vocabulary (even though it isn't actually a speech act, although it does have pragmatic value). I do sometimes communicate flirtatiousness and "this is an in-joke" and conspiratoriness (or whatever the correct word is), but I do this with facial expression and tone of voice in a way that I can't quite articulate yet because I've given this about 30 seconds of thought so far.
I wonder, if you studied it, if there would be demographic patterns among people who do or don't wink as part of their active vocabulary of body language? And I wonder if there are similar patterns for other kinds of body language?
I wonder, if you studied it, if there would be demographic patterns among people who do or don't wink as part of their active vocabulary of body language? And I wonder if there are similar patterns for other kinds of body language?
Pacing
I decided to see how much I pace. I'm working at home today, so I put on my pedometer when I turned on my computer at 7:30 a.m. Now it's 5 pm, and I have 3,729 steps on my pedometer. This is after a day spent theoretically sitting at the computer all day. Realistically I'd go to the kitchen for food or coffee, and I was doing laundry so I was walking back and forth from the bedroom to the bathroom, but still, that's 3,729 steps within a 500 square foot apartment while doing 9.5 hours of computer work. Apparently we're supposed to walk 10,000 steps each day which is equal to about five miles, so that means I've walked about 1.8 miles today, just within the apartment. I haven't even done my grocery run yet!
So maybe people can stop telling me to walk for exercise now?
So maybe people can stop telling me to walk for exercise now?
Sex and gender questions in Star Trek
1. In an early episode of DS9, Sisko gets mad at Dax and says something like "If you were still a man..." with the implication that he'd hit her but for the fact that she's now in a female body. I'm kind of surprised that the idea that boys shouldn't hit girls would still be around in the 24th century. It's an old-fashioned idea - don't get me wrong, I appreciate it, it makes life more convenient for me, but it is old-fashioned - and I can't see it being around 400 years in the future. I know they can't really go around showing on TV Sisko hitting Dax (or, rather, Avery Brooks hitting Terry Farrell) but they could make it because he's her commanding officer or he could smack his fist on the desk and get all in her face or do something different.
2. The Ferengis are sometimes idly touch their own ears. But it's a sex act for someone else to stroke a Ferengi's ears. So when they touch their own ears, is that masturbatory?
3. There's an episode of TNG where an alien from a genderless planet comes to the realization that she is female, and is ostracized for it. It was supposed to be an allegory for homosexuality. But the flaw in the logic is that how can you have a gender that doesn't exist at all within your species, that can't even be defined or explained within your gender framework? That's would be like a human coming to the realization that they are in fact a cogenitor.
2. The Ferengis are sometimes idly touch their own ears. But it's a sex act for someone else to stroke a Ferengi's ears. So when they touch their own ears, is that masturbatory?
3. There's an episode of TNG where an alien from a genderless planet comes to the realization that she is female, and is ostracized for it. It was supposed to be an allegory for homosexuality. But the flaw in the logic is that how can you have a gender that doesn't exist at all within your species, that can't even be defined or explained within your gender framework? That's would be like a human coming to the realization that they are in fact a cogenitor.
Okay, fine, here's a real election night drinking game
I'm getting a lot of hits from people looking for election night drinking games, so I made one that's applicable to any election.
In every election, there's a key number. If you're in the market for an election drinking game, you know what it is. For example, in a Canadian federal election the key number is 155, because a party needs 155 seats to win a majority.
Take a shot every time someone utters the key number.
In every election, there's a key number. If you're in the market for an election drinking game, you know what it is. For example, in a Canadian federal election the key number is 155, because a party needs 155 seats to win a majority.
Take a shot every time someone utters the key number.
Things Blogger Should Invent: Delete Draft function on the Create Post page
I started writing a post, but it wasn't going anywhere so I stopped. However, in the meantime, Blogger had autosaved a draft. Now that draft is sitting there somewhere on my Edit Posts page, and if I want to get rid of it I have to go to that page and delete it.
This is inconvenient. There should be a function right on the Create Posts page (or that comes up when you exit the Create Posts page without publishing or saving) that allows you to delete the draft.
This is inconvenient. There should be a function right on the Create Posts page (or that comes up when you exit the Create Posts page without publishing or saving) that allows you to delete the draft.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Things They Should Invent: indoctrinate children in boosting their peers' self-esteem
When I was a kid I had no self-esteem, mostly as a result of the way I was treated by my peers. Now I have better self-esteem (I'm hesitant to state in objective terms that I have good self-esteem because 10 years from now I might look back and laugh), mostly as a result of being treated decently by the vast majority of people I encounter, and that makes me a more pleasant person. A lot of the chips have fallen off my shoulders; I can be humble, I can be flawed, I don't feel the need to constantly prove myself worthy because I have a sense of self-worth. I don't need to be right - in fact, I try to always admit when I'm less than certain I'm right* - and that makes me much more pleasant to deal with.
Since the original problem was the treatment at the hands of my peers, and since this isn't an uncommon experience, that got me thinking: what if there was a way to explain to kids - to get them to really grok - that if they don't go around destroying their peers' self-esteem, those peers would be more pleasant to deal with? When I was a kid we got the "you should be nice to people" message and the "if you're good to people you'll go to heaven and if you're mean to them you'll go to hell" message and various storybooks and cartoons where the kind and cheerful heroine always wins everyone over and saves the day, but it was just there as a thou shalt. I wonder if it would be more useful to explain to the kids what the specific benefits to them would be instead of just the general message that if you're nice to people there will be certain nonspecific benefits in the future.
When you're really little they drill in please and thank you and you're welcome and excuse me and I'm sorry, but they don't teach the meanings and motivations behind them. They were at best magic words and at worst burdens (like when the parents made me apologize to people for stuff I wasn't sorry for) and for the longest time I didn't use them with my peers because they were just tricks the grownups wanted us to do. I wonder if that would have worked out differently if they'd been able to explain the reasoning to me better than "You have to be polite."
*I started doing this as part of translation brain. I tell my colleagues who look over my work how certain or uncertain I am about various things, so they know where to focus their attention. In my line of work it's not important for me to be right, it's important for the text to be right; if everything in the whole text has to be corrected before it can be sent out, that's a far better outcome than if I convinced everyone that the text was perfect and sent it out flawed. Then I started doing it in other areas of life too, and I like it so I'm keeping it. I keep reading where people think it's a sign of weakness to qualify your every statement, but I find in the long run it gives me a certain authority. Since I normally qualify everything and have been doing so for years, when I make an outright declarative statement people tend to listen.
Since the original problem was the treatment at the hands of my peers, and since this isn't an uncommon experience, that got me thinking: what if there was a way to explain to kids - to get them to really grok - that if they don't go around destroying their peers' self-esteem, those peers would be more pleasant to deal with? When I was a kid we got the "you should be nice to people" message and the "if you're good to people you'll go to heaven and if you're mean to them you'll go to hell" message and various storybooks and cartoons where the kind and cheerful heroine always wins everyone over and saves the day, but it was just there as a thou shalt. I wonder if it would be more useful to explain to the kids what the specific benefits to them would be instead of just the general message that if you're nice to people there will be certain nonspecific benefits in the future.
When you're really little they drill in please and thank you and you're welcome and excuse me and I'm sorry, but they don't teach the meanings and motivations behind them. They were at best magic words and at worst burdens (like when the parents made me apologize to people for stuff I wasn't sorry for) and for the longest time I didn't use them with my peers because they were just tricks the grownups wanted us to do. I wonder if that would have worked out differently if they'd been able to explain the reasoning to me better than "You have to be polite."
*I started doing this as part of translation brain. I tell my colleagues who look over my work how certain or uncertain I am about various things, so they know where to focus their attention. In my line of work it's not important for me to be right, it's important for the text to be right; if everything in the whole text has to be corrected before it can be sent out, that's a far better outcome than if I convinced everyone that the text was perfect and sent it out flawed. Then I started doing it in other areas of life too, and I like it so I'm keeping it. I keep reading where people think it's a sign of weakness to qualify your every statement, but I find in the long run it gives me a certain authority. Since I normally qualify everything and have been doing so for years, when I make an outright declarative statement people tend to listen.
Teleprompters
On TV news shows, when the newsreader is reading off a teleprompter, who wrote the stuff that appears on the teleprompter?
Open Letter to lexicographers everywhere
Dear lexicographers, especially lexicographers of multilingual dictionaries:
You need to include profanity in your dictionaries. Why? Because if you don't, people looking up those words who honestly don't know what they mean aren't going to learn that they're profanity. If you don't know a language's profanity, it's very difficult to tell by googling whether it's profanity or just slang.
Helping non-native speakers catch these nuances before they make an ass of themselves is far more important than denying 12-year-olds an opportunity to giggle.
And please, whatever you do, don't put the literal meaning of the word but fail to mention that it also has a profane meaning! Unless, like, you want people walking around the dog park going "Hi you little bitch!"
You need to include profanity in your dictionaries. Why? Because if you don't, people looking up those words who honestly don't know what they mean aren't going to learn that they're profanity. If you don't know a language's profanity, it's very difficult to tell by googling whether it's profanity or just slang.
Helping non-native speakers catch these nuances before they make an ass of themselves is far more important than denying 12-year-olds an opportunity to giggle.
And please, whatever you do, don't put the literal meaning of the word but fail to mention that it also has a profane meaning! Unless, like, you want people walking around the dog park going "Hi you little bitch!"
Shiba Inu!
This is a Shiba Inu puppy.
I'd never heard of that breed before, but I think it might be my new favourite (insofar as I might have favourite breeds - I'm not a huge breed person).
I'd never heard of that breed before, but I think it might be my new favourite (insofar as I might have favourite breeds - I'm not a huge breed person).
Things Gmail Should Invent: recognize the word "spoilers"
In Gmail's inbox view, you can see the first line of every message. Usually this is convenient, but if the email contains spoilers you have to trust your correspondent not only to mark the subject line, but also to leave the spoilers out of the preview section, which might not occur to them if they're using a different email system.
What Gmail should do is if the subject line contains the word "spoilers", it shouldn't show you any previews.
Bonus points for also recognizing that "no spoilers" doesn't need to be hidden.
What Gmail should do is if the subject line contains the word "spoilers", it shouldn't show you any previews.
Bonus points for also recognizing that "no spoilers" doesn't need to be hidden.
What if xmas decorations cause SAD?
I think the earlier I see xmas stuff in stores, the more the darkness affects me. It's really getting to me this year (yes, already - yes, even before daylight savings time ends), and I saw xmas cards at Shopper's LAST WEEKEND!!! BEFORE HALLOWEEN!!!
Xmas happens at literally the darkest time of the year. So I'm wondering if all this xmas stuff is adding to the psychological darkness, because the presence of xmas stuff always happened at the darkest time of the year? For the vast majority of my life, I wasn't really in malls and stores and stuff very often in the run-up to xmas. When I was a child I obviously wasn't responsible for errands, and in uni I lived on campus so I only went shopping off campus like once a week. I'd see xmas decorations at home and I'd see lights on other people's homes, sometimes they'd put up decorations in classrooms too, but this would never happen before December, right when the deepest of the darkness is firmly entrenched. But now I have to walk through a mall to get to the subway on both ends of my commute, and I'm preparing all my meals and maintaining a household so I'm buying way more stuff (groceries, toilet paper, toothpaste, etc.) And every year as I spend more time in xmas-decorated commercial environments, the darkness gets to me even more.
Can we maybe test this theory one year by keeping xmas stuff out of stores until Advent?
Xmas happens at literally the darkest time of the year. So I'm wondering if all this xmas stuff is adding to the psychological darkness, because the presence of xmas stuff always happened at the darkest time of the year? For the vast majority of my life, I wasn't really in malls and stores and stuff very often in the run-up to xmas. When I was a child I obviously wasn't responsible for errands, and in uni I lived on campus so I only went shopping off campus like once a week. I'd see xmas decorations at home and I'd see lights on other people's homes, sometimes they'd put up decorations in classrooms too, but this would never happen before December, right when the deepest of the darkness is firmly entrenched. But now I have to walk through a mall to get to the subway on both ends of my commute, and I'm preparing all my meals and maintaining a household so I'm buying way more stuff (groceries, toilet paper, toothpaste, etc.) And every year as I spend more time in xmas-decorated commercial environments, the darkness gets to me even more.
Can we maybe test this theory one year by keeping xmas stuff out of stores until Advent?
Sunday, October 26, 2008
An observation
I have been told that I should cut off and donate my hair about ten times as often as I have been told that I should donate blood.
Things They Should Invent: long hair compatible vacuums
Whenever I vacuum, I always end up with hair entangled around my vacuum brushes, which I then have to clean off.
Why can't they design a vacuum that will just suck long hair directly into the vacuum bag without it getting all tangled around the brushes and other vacuum parts?
Why can't they design a vacuum that will just suck long hair directly into the vacuum bag without it getting all tangled around the brushes and other vacuum parts?
Why does high school still matter to Betty Suarez?
Several times on Ugly Betty there have been plot points involving her baggage from high school. She's mentioned a couple times like it still matters to her that she stayed home from prom, and recently there's been a character who was her high school bully and she was excited when this girl invited her to go clubbing with her.
But why does this matter so much to her? She's been to university! Why doesn't she have any baggage from university? Even if high school baggage is necessary sometimes, it would be far more realistic if she had even more university baggage.
But why does this matter so much to her? She's been to university! Why doesn't she have any baggage from university? Even if high school baggage is necessary sometimes, it would be far more realistic if she had even more university baggage.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
My hair is mocking me
My hair line is square and I hate that. Like there are actual right angles at the top corners of my face, and it looks disgusting and butch. But right now, right this exact moment, my hair has somehow arranged itself so it's covering the top corners and making my hairline look normal, and yet it isn't perfectly flat on top and it isn't falling into my eyes, both of which always happen with any attempt to hide my corners.
It has never done this before and I have no idea why or how it's doing this or how to duplicate the effect in the future.
(Today is Shallowest. Posts. Ever. Day)
It has never done this before and I have no idea why or how it's doing this or how to duplicate the effect in the future.
(Today is Shallowest. Posts. Ever. Day)
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