Saturday, March 28, 2009

Things They Should Invent: hair removal method for hairs that aren't there

Every method of hair removal will only remove hairs that are there. So why's this a problem you're asking? Let me give you an example:

I pluck my eyebrows every day. This means that at any given time, there are a bunch of eyebrow hairs that are queued up to grow back, but currently are not visible. If I were to go get my eyebrows done professionally, or I were to go get my stray eyebrow hairs permanently removed, they would only remove the unwanted hairs that they can see. A week later, I'd once again have a bunch of stray eyebrow hairs, because the hairs that were not there when I got my eyebrows done will have grown back. If I want literally all my excess eyebrow hairs removed, I'd have to let my whole shaggy unibrow grow back in, which means I'd have to spend probably a couple of weeks walking around looking butch and undignified.

There must be some kind of thingy inside my skin that tells it "Grow another hair back right here." (I don't have the terminology, but you know what I mean?) I want to be able to take the entire bridge of my nose between my eyebrows and tell all those thingies inside my skin "Don't grow any more hairs here, at all, ever." Or perhaps remove from my skin the thingies that tell it to grow a hair here.

I would pay enormous amounts of money for this.

2 comments:

Me said...

You're preaching to the choir. And I'm a guy, so the problem is compounded. I explain myself rather embarassingly in this vlog here.

laura k said...

Do you mean permanent hair removal? Does laser removal do that?