A lot of commentators have been framing this as an immigration issue or a Muslim issue, but I don't think it is.
Aqsa Parvez, 16, who died Monday night after being attacked in her Mississauga home, wanted to hang out with friends instead of obeying her 5 p.m. curfew. She wanted to listen to rap, hip hop and R & B, which her parents didn't permit.
Vivacious and outgoing, Parvez wanted to dress like a Western woman in tight-fitting clothes and show off her long, dark hair by removing her hijab.
She wanted to be "free" and independent of her family's devout Muslim beliefs.
Think about your own adolescence. Did you ever want to hang out with friends instead of being home when your parents wanted you to? Did you ever want to listen to music they didn't want you to? Did you ever want to dress in a way they didn't want you to? Did you ever want to throw off the trappings of their values and be your own person?
This same drama is playing out in millions of households all around the world. There are, of course, variations. Perhaps instead of a hijab, the clothing in contention is hemlines or cleavage or heels. Perhaps instead of Muslim beliefs, it's Catholicism or Mormonism or Orthodox Judaism. But it is happening. And in some of these families, they do beat up their kids for not conforming. Hopefully in most they don't, but in some they do. I don't have statistics on hand to back this up, but I'd bet real money that within the next year, some other kid somewhere in the world will be killed by their parents in a similar dispute, and they won't be Muslim or a new immigrant.
So let's think carefully before labelling as an immigration issue or a Muslim issue. The real problem (if all the allegations are true - insert the word allegedly wherever legally necessary) is that the father thought threats and violence and controlfreakism were appropriate responses to a disagreement over fashion and pop culture.
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The real problem (if all the allegations are true - insert the word allegedly wherever legally necessary) is that the father thought threats and violence and controlfreakism were appropriate responses to a disagreement over fashion and pop culture.
I see your point, but it seems the disagreement wasn't really over fashion and pop culture so much as over their religion and the clash of the father's devout religious practices with the daughter's taste for fashion, pop culture, "Western" lifestyles, etc.
So, although I don't think it's a Muslim issue exclusively, I think it is a religious issue and also partly an immigration issue, and that we can't pretend otherwise.
It's not a Muslim issue or immigration issue at all. Frankly, I'm amazed that anyone thinks it is.
Abusive parents? Violently punishing children for not conforming? These are not peculiar to Muslims or immigrants.
In the US, this behaviour is most commonly found among Christian fundamentalists. It doesn't always result in death, fortunately, but the sentiments are all the same.
I guess I should blog about this. Thanks for the push.
Paaaalease! Have you ever heard of "honour killing"? Look it up. It's true that it can happen in any religion or demographic group, but chances are when something like this happens it's very much a muslim.
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