impudent strumpet

Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines

Monday, June 30, 2008

Banned words in court

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From Language Log : The latest development is that a number of courts in the US are now forbidding lawyers and witnesses to use certain word...
1 comment:

Do fire sprinklers come with an off switch?

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They either just passed or are about to pass legislation requiring fire sprinklers in residential highrises. I have one question: can the pe...
5 comments:
Sunday, June 29, 2008

Gee, he was just here a minute ago

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We love you George! (Returning to regularly scheduled programming tomorrow.)

Tits.

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The Globe and Mail thinks that La Senza's dropping sales of the ITEC bra and rising sales of cotton bras are a sign of poor economic tim...
Saturday, June 28, 2008

Motherfucker.

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There's a sort of conventional wisdom that having a present father is good for a child, and you tend to hear this most and loudest from ...
1 comment:
Friday, June 27, 2008

Cocksucker.

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Two years ago, I issued a Pride Day challenge for factual use of "That is SO gay!" (And no less an authority than The Onion has ...
Thursday, June 26, 2008

Cunt.

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So Catholic bishops in Alberta are opposed to the cervical cancer vaccine because they think it will encourage girls to have casual sex. Yo...
Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Piss.

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The bathroom at work has automatic flushing toilets - very enthusiastic automatic flushing toilets that sometimes flush when I've just s...
1 comment:
Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Shit.

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I wonder why laxatives always market towards women? I've never heard of constipation as a "female problem". I've had a n...
1 comment:
Monday, June 23, 2008

Fuck.

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George Carlin died But but but...but...but we still need him!
1 comment:
Sunday, June 22, 2008

I wonder if battery sales have dropped with the advent of the iPod?

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I was just changing the batteries on my Scrubbing Bubbles, and I realized this is the first time that I have used batteries for anything in ...

Best bikini wax soundtrack ever of the day

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Holding Out For A Hero by Bonnie Tyler This is a fun song to sing. It makes you feel kick-ass. (I know that's not quite the message o...

Things They Should Invent: topsoil transplant

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One thing we were told repeatedly in school was that Southern Ontario has some of the best farmland in the country, but it keeps getting use...
1 comment:

When everyone has kids at once

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I was poking around on Facebook, and saw that a bunch of people I went to high school with have had babies (or at least they were holding ba...

Things They Should Invent: temporal localization

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Sometimes when I read a book that was written in the past and set in what was then the present (but is now the past), there are things or id...
1 comment:

Is Google Ontario-centric?

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I just google for the population of Manitoba. I got three relevant results, then I got one of those "helpful" little Google sugge...
2 comments:
Saturday, June 21, 2008

Make me a t-shirt

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Demetri Martin has a t-shirt that says COMEDY. I want a similar t-shirt that says TRAGEDY. Girl-shaped (preferably v-necked) and dark or de...
1 comment:

How to write a new Hockey Night in Canada theme

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You know how the Simpsons changes existing numbers from major musicals just a little bit, so they're still easily recognizable but (pres...

Why is rape used as a weapon of war in the first place?

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From a perspective of pure heartless military strategy with no consideration for human decency whatsoever, why is rape worth using as a weap...
5 comments:
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impudent strumpet
I collect languages, give away free ideas, and construct precision analogies.
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