Tuesday, June 30, 2009

I think smaller favours are bigger than bigger favours

Several times on the internet I've seen parents say that the difference between parents and non-parents is that parents would risk their lives to save their kid. Of course we know that isn't true - I think most people would risk their life to save a kid. A kid falls onto the subway tracks, people aren't going to stand there doing nothing. I once ran out into traffic to save a teddy bear tossed there by a baby who was too little to know better, and there were at least three people on that sidewalk also moving to go after the teddy bear. Poor kid shouldn't have to lose his best friend just because he's too little to understand natural consequences and the laws of physics.

So yeah, risking my life to save a kid, of course, no question. But no way in hell I want to have to wake up early in the morning and sit around a rink watching hockey practice.

You sometimes see similar things in the Star's Acts of Kindness section. Sometimes you get people telling stories of, for example, a little old lady who has these thuggish-looking young men living next door, but these guys totally helped her and called 911 and stayed with her when she had a fall one icy winter's day, and maybe even shoveled her walk for her after that. And these guys would probably be like "Yeah, of course, basic human decency, you'd do the same for my grandmother." But, at the same time, they might not want to turn down their music when they're having a party.

You'd totally do CPR on someone who you'd never kiss, or never even want to have small-talk with in the checkout line. If your friend had their wallet stolen, you'd totally press a wad of cash into their hand to tide them over until they can get a replacement debit card, but you'd hide the last chocolate bar in your office stash so they don't mooch it. You might neglect to look up from your book at each subway stop so as not to have to give up your seat for a senior with a cane, but if there's an emergency and you have to evacuate the train into the tunnel you will totally see to it personally that they get out safely.

So maybe the smaller kindnesses are more generous than the bigger kindnesses?

1 comment:

laura k said...

You're onto something here.