Every summer up until the summer after grade 9, I wore running shoes and
socks during the summer and got a hideous sock tan. I couldn't do anything
about the sock tan, however, because it was too hideous for me to brave
exposing my feet to the general public.

The summer after grade 10, I finally got brave enough to wear sandals in
public, and I've been wearing sandals all summer every summer ever since.
The last time I wore socks outside in the summer was in 1995. So why do I
still have the damn sock tan????

On an unrelated note, every couple of weeks I am accosted on the street by
someone trying to sell me a discount spa package. Do I look like I need a
spa or something? I'd go if it was free, but it isn't something I'd pay
for.

Note to the spa guy at Yonge & Sheppard today: to make your pitch more
effective, you need to:
1) say "Excuse me, ma'am," instead of just "Excuse me" (just excuse me makes
you sound like a lost tourist);
2) have a brochure or some literature in hand, or at least a nametag that
clearly identifies you as a spa employee. Having some random civilian guy
walk up to me and start talking about spa treatments is kind of creepy;
3) be (or at least act) gayer. If I must have a discussion about spa
treatments with a strange man (discussion with a strange man, not spa
treatments with a strange man), it's much more comfortable if he's
reasonably gay. But then that just might be my (politically incorrect,
borderline-objectifying) preference for gay men as customer service
representatives.